How different would life be if there was a rewind button? Fortunately, thanks to the children’s home, 24-year-old Cole Tamarri (far left, pictured with his fellow 2013 graduates) was able to experience the next best thing: a second chance.
Cole grew up in the Midwest, often moving from home to home. He was living on his grandfather’s farm when circumstances arose that put him in need of a stable home. Through recommendations from Masons, Cole’s grandfather found the Masonic Children’s Home, and Cole made the move in fourth grade.
Life at the children’s home was more fast-paced than Cole was used to in the Midwest, but he adjusted quickly, even though he was 700 miles away from everything he knew. “I felt like I could be more myself because I was finally around people my age,” Cole remembers. “I was blessed to have house parents that eased the transition for me, too.”
There was one particular moment when Cole realized he had found true happiness in his new situation.
“I remember when the donors got us Phillies tickets,” he said. “We were on our ride back from Philadelphia in the van. It was some guys and our house parent, and we were just talking. I knew then that I was surrounded by kind people who were going to make me a better person.”
Cole knows he was lucky to experience this feeling so quickly, as some children take longer to adjust.
“When I was living there, all the boys shared rooms,” Cole remembers. “That forced you by proxy to really get to know the person you were living with. These were guys from all different situations. You’re away from what you know as ‘home,’ so it forces you to be resilient.”
Upon entering high school, Cole experienced some emotional hardship, which affected his drive for academics. Staff worked with Cole to ignite a fire and self-discipline inside of him. “They did constantly push me to do better,” Cole said. For the first time, he had people advocating for him in school.
“I always knew they were in my corner,” Cole recalls. “If the staff had to go to bat for us, they would, just like any other parent, but don’t get me wrong. If they needed to rationalize with you, they would. They always knew how to remind you that life is not as serious as we make it, and life moves forward. You can either go with it, or not.”
Staff even encouraged Cole to apply for college upon his graduation from the program in 2013.
“If I stayed at home, I would have been forced to continue growing up way too fast,” Cole said. “The children’s home gave me the most normal childhood I could have had, and college felt like the next step.”
However, college wasn’t something Cole was ready for. After one semester, he chose to resign and enter the workforce. After a few years, he gained the confidence and maturity he needed to finish out his dream of a college degree. Cole worked his way through two years of community college before feeling prepared enough to enter into a university again and apply for a scholarship through the children’s home.
“They’re giving me a second try at college,” Cole said. “I said, ‘here’s what I did wrong, and here’s what I’ll do better.’ I put myself through those two years of community college, and I really want to get my bachelor’s degree. I can’t thank them enough for giving me a second chance, but I know that’s what they’re all about.”
At East Stroudsburg University, Cole writes and serves as the advertising manager for the school’s newspaper. He plans to graduate in the spring of 2020 with a bachelor’s degree in English. As an adult, Cole is grateful for the perspective the children’s home provided him.
“Being surrounded by a blend of kids opens your mind,” he said. “If I hadn’t grown up where I grew up, I would not have a deep appreciation for different cultures, lifestyles and opinions.”
As a writer, Cole has gotten used to hearing others’ stories, so telling his own is not always easy. However, he believes it is one worth telling.
“People who support the children’s home need to know that what they do is incredibly important,” Cole says. “They have created a place where children can grow without worrying about their base-level needs, like whether their lights or heat are going to stay on. Not every kid has someone to invest in them.”
Most importantly, children’s home staff and supporters are teaching children not to be afraid of failure.
“Even though the kids don’t express it every day, they know they’re getting a leg up in this world,” Cole said. “I bet if you took every one of these kids to the side and talked to them, they would express, in their own way, how the donors are making a difference in their life.”
Cole’s time at the children’s home is something he wouldn’t rewind for a “do over.” “Without that experience, my story would be ending differently,” he says.